living is in the texture No. 2

have you ever thought about dying? 

well not the dying, but the realization of dying. 

the thin veil between living and dying. 

do you ever think about that? 

i do. 

sometimes when a moment is so full 

    i feel like i am choking on it. 

i think – i will see this right before the darkness 

   settles on me. 

i will see their faces. and smell this june night. 

i will hear these crickets and their laughter 

    trailing through the leaves. 

i will feel her hair tickle my face as 

  she settles contentedly into my shoulder. 

when my lungs exhale for the final time - 

    the delicate veil rips and the ethereal 

       dissolves into eternal. 

i will smile. 

and recite Blake, “to see a world in a grain

   of sand. to hold infinity in the palm of

 your hand.” 

one day would have been enough. 

the living is in the texture. 

and I held thousands of grains.

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